Understanding Growth & Young Adulthood
27 Oct – written by Katrin Kemmerzehl – Blog
As we walk through life, we’re constantly changing, physically, emotionally, and psychologically. Each chapter of our journey shapes how we understand ourselves, others, and the world around us.
From our first breath to our later years, human development is a lifelong process, influenced by relationships, experiences, and culture.
Development is often described as multidimensional and multidirectional (Baltes, 1987). It includes growth and loss, stability and change, and sometimes all at once. Across our lifetime, we move through stages that bring unique challenges, opportunities, and meaning.
The Lifespan Perspective
The lifespan perspective views lifelong development as a process that unfolds across three interconnected domains:
- Physical development – changes in body, brain, health, and movement.
- Cognitive development – growth in thinking, reasoning, and problem-solving.
- Emotional and social development – the ways we form attachments, understand ourselves, and connect with others.
At each age, we face specific tasks and experiences that help us mature into who we are.
One of the most influential frameworks for understanding these stages comes from Erik Erikson’s Psychosocial Theory.
Erikson’s Psychosocial Theory: A Lifelong Journey of Growth
Erik Erikson (1950) believed that human beings grow through eight psychosocial stages, each defined by a central conflict that helps shape our personality and emotional well-being.
Successfully navigating each stage leads to strengths that support the next phase of life. Here’s an overview of these eight stages and the questions they ask of us:
Infancy (Birth – 1 year): Trust vs. Mistrust
When caregivers are loving and responsive, babies learn that the world is a safe place.
However, if care is inconsistent or harsh, mistrust may develop. Bowlby’s Attachment Theory later expanded on this idea.
Toddlerhood (1 – 3 years): Autonomy vs. Shame and Doubt
As toddlers begin exploring independence, they need gentle guidance and freedom within limits.
Support at this stage builds confidence, whereas overcontrol or criticism can create shame and self-doubt.
Early Childhood (3 – 6 years): Initiative vs. Guilt
Through play and imagination, children experiment with decision-making and leadership.
Encouragement can help to develop purpose, while excessive control can lead to guilt or fear of failure.
Middle Childhood (6 – 11 years): Industry vs. Inferiority
School and social life teach children competence and perseverance.
Positive feedback builds self-worth, while constant criticism or comparison can lead to feelings of inferiority.
Adolescence (12 – 18 years): Identity vs. Role Confusion
Teenagers begin asking “Who am I?” They explore beliefs, roles, and values.
Success leads to a stable sense of identity. Confusion or pressure can leave them unsure of their place in the world.
Young Adulthood (18 – 40 years): Intimacy vs. Isolation
Once identity is formed, the focus shifts to closeness. Building loving, trusting relationships requires vulnerability.
When identity is unclear, intimacy can feel threatening, leading to loneliness or isolation.
Middle Adulthood (40 – 65 years): Generativity vs. Stagnation
Adults often seek to nurture others, through family, work, or community.
When unable to contribute meaningfully, people may feel stuck or disconnected from purpose.
Later Adulthood (65+ years): Integrity vs. Despair
Looking back, individuals reflect on whether life has been fulfilling. Acceptance brings peace and integrity; regret may lead to despair or fear of death.
Erikson’s theory reminds us that development never stops. Every stage brings new possibilities for growth, healing, and meaning.
Let’s take a closer look at young adulthood. What are the opportunities and challenges young adults face on their journey?
Young Adulthood: Intimacy and the Search for Connection
Young adulthood is a transformative period. It’s a time of forming deep relationships, pursuing independence, and establishing identity in the world.
Early adulthood also brings other momentous changes— among them, choosing a vocation, starting full-time work, and attaining economic independence.
These are energetic decades filled with momentous decisions that, more than any other time of life, offer the potential for living to the fullest.
Erikson described this stage as Intimacy vs. Isolation, the challenge of developing close, meaningful bonds without losing a sense of self. For intimacy to flourish, young adults need a solid foundation of identity.
This stage doesn’t just refer to romantic love—it also includes friendships, mentorships, and a broader sense of community.
When intimacy succeeds, we experience love, trust, and belonging. When it doesn’t, loneliness or emotional distance can arise.
Modern relationships also look more colourful. Many young people today delay marriage or choose cohabitation, exploring what intimacy means beyond traditional roles. Research suggests that couples who communicate openly and maintain a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interactions are more likely to build lasting, fulfilling relationships (Gottman, 1995).
In therapy, young adults often explore questions such as: Who am I, and what do I value most? How do I create meaningful relationships while staying true to myself? How can I balance freedom and commitment?
A Gradual Transition: Emerging Adulthood
Psychologist Jeffrey Arnett (2000) proposed that between the late teens and late twenties, people enter a distinct phase called Emerging Adulthood.
It’s a modern stage of explorationtime of self-discovery and experimentation, and a bridge between adolescence and full adulthood.
In emerging adulthood, many young people do not view themselves as fully adult. Rather, those with economic resources engage in extended exploration of alternatives in education, work, and personal values. Identity development can continue into the college years.
Arnett identified five key features of emerging adulthood:
- Identity exploration – trying out different life paths, jobs, and relationships.
- Instability – frequent changes in residence, education, and goals.
- Self-focus – learning independence and personal responsibility.
- Feeling in-between – not quite a teenager, but not yet fully an adult.
- Possibilities – a strong sense of hope and potential for the future.
This period can be exciting but also stressful. The freedom to choose comes with uncertainty, financial pressure, social comparison, and questions about purpose are common.
Many young adults feel anxious about “getting it right” or fear being left behind (Twenge et al., 2019).
Development as a Lifelong Process
From our earliest days to old age, development remains a lifelong and dynamic process. Each stage influences the next, shaping how we love, work, and find meaning.
Growth doesn’t follow a straight path. It’s full of detours, surprises, and moments of reflection.
In young adulthood, life often feels like standing at a crossroads: choosing a career, exploring love, redefining family, or simply finding one’s footing.
Yet within this uncertainty lies opportunity – the chance to become the person you want to be.
Counselling in Young Adulthood
Therapy can be supportive during this time, offering a safe space to explore identity, relationships, and future directions without judgment.
It helps young adults make sense of competing expectations while building self-compassion and resilience.
Every stage of life invites us to grow through challenge. And when we do, we not only understand ourselves better, but also connect more fully with others and the world around us. If this is something you’d like to explore, please reach out.
References
- Arnett, J. J. (2000). Emerging adulthood: A theory of development from the late teens through the twenties. American Psychologist, 55(5), 469–480.
- Baltes, P. B. (1987). Theoretical propositions of life-span developmental psychology: On the dynamics between growth and decline. Developmental Psychology, 23(5), 611–626.
- Berk, L. E. (2018). Development through the lifespan (7th ed.). Pearson Education.
- Bowlby, J. (1969). Attachment and loss: Vol. 1. Attachment. Basic Books.
- Erikson, E. H. (1950). Childhood and society. W. W. Norton.
- Gottman, J. (1995). Why marriages succeed or fail. Simon & Schuster.
- Twenge, J. M., Cooper, A. B., Joiner, T. E., Duffy, M. E., & Binau, S. G. (2019). Age, period, and cohort trends in mood and anxiety disorders among U.S. adolescents and adults, 2005–2017. Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 128(3), 185–199.
Katrin Kemmerzehl
I am a qualified psychotherapeutic counsellor in Newcastle upon Tyne.
Please get in touch if you’re interested in arranging a consultation.